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Reactions

This is your chance to use your voice, to share your reactions to my writing, workshops and therapy. Email your reactions to jeremy@jgs.net

Thank you very much for responding so quickly. Your tips were really helpful [from article on Raising A Sensitive Child on Education.com]. I have noticed loss of sleep the last few nights because I just can’t seem to “turn off” my mind. When I can’t help my son deal with his emotions it makes me feel like I am struggling as a parent. This is unacceptable to me as my children are the most important part of my life.  So I thank you for your reminders. It feels some weight has been lifted off my shoulders seeing as we are not the only parents struggling in this area. Again, I want to thank you. You have guided us in a direction in which success we will only accomplish. We just needed some guidance. – S.J.

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Thanks for being so supportive and for all the suggestions for finding a therapist in Canada we could speak to. I would greatly appreciate being able to continue working with you–especially after hearing you on the radio show in Montreal. I have many questions and am very keen to do the right thing for my family. Thanks again for all your help. – A.M.

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Today I read the article I Am Their Daddy; Their Daddy Is Me. I have done a lot of internet searching but like you mentioned during your CNN interview there really is not a lot out there.  I have read a lot of what is available through Fatherville and other sites I have found.  I am in charge of link exchanges with other sites so I have looked at a bunch of them!  None of the articles I have read have come anywhere close to impacting me as this article has.  It has already affected the way I handle my relationship with my kids.  I feel as if I owe you for a therapy session!  I don’t know if you are interested in what parts impacted me and I don’t want to bore you.  I just wanted to take this opportunity to sincerely thank you for the help.  All three of my children went to bed happier tonight than I have seen in a long time.  I suffer from severe migraines and unfortunately my kids suffer from my down time.  My kids all knew I had one today because I stayed in bed late.  I was up for a while and was going back to bed to try to sleep it off.  After I read your article and had time to think about I decided to stay up despite the headache.  Before the day was over all my kids, even the two year old, made a comment that they knew I had a headache but still spent time with them. - D.R.

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I just turned 23 years old and have a daughter. Just as you said in your write-up [For Expecting Fathers, Don't Expect An Immediate Connection], I love my daughter but just don’t feel it. I struggle with some stuff passed down on the maternal side. I thought maybe this had something to do with it but your article made me see things differently.  Three quarters of the way through the article, I actually started to tear up.  I realized that I have been foolish in thinking there is something wrong with me that  I feel nothing toward my daughter at this time.  I have always hoped that in time the situation would take care of itself, and your words have helped to reassure me of that.

I just wanted to write and thank you for your advice in a very well written article. - JS

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I can totally relate to your story [Say It. Just Say It.]. As a child growing up, my parents weren’t very affectionate. They never hugged, kissed, or touched me. I’m sure my dad hugged me when I was a baby, but I can only remember a total of four times the first 32 years of my life. The first was when I made all A’s in middle school, the second time was when I graduated from college, the third time was at my first wedding, and the fourth time was when he accepted my decision to divorce my first husband. I knew that they loved me and were proud of me, but I had to figure that out myself. They have changed as they have grown older. In the last two years, my dad has learned to hug me often and it really makes me feel good even at the age of 40. I think it is good to hug your children and your parents. I try to hug my youngest stepson as much as he will allow me. And, my husband hugs me everyday. - Anonymous

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I just read your article titled “Second Fiddle” about how you feel like an invisible parent around your children.  I have a 2.5 year old daughter and am experiencing the same issues.  I think it has always been there, but now that she’s really getting expressive and a big vocabulary it seems so much worse and hurts so much more.  It sometimes almost brings me to tears to feel like she would rather under any circumstances be with my wife than me. - Jason


After reading your article, “Second Fiddle”, I finally felt a sense of relief that SOMEONE out there has the same problem I do. I have searched for days on the topic of children favoring Mommy over Daddy, and have found very little on the subject. I came to believe that it just didn’t exist with other people, and somehow I have failed as a parent. Ever since she was born, my daughter, now four years old, has favored her Mommy over Daddy. My wife and I both work, and spend almost equal time with her. But, much of the time, especially at night, she wants Mommy to do everything. I especially related to your description of how you felt you were “the side order that comes free with the meal, but nobody wants anyway” and when your children fought to sit on Mommy’s lap, you felt you were on the outside looking in at your family. Those have been my feelings exactly. Thank you for posting yourarticle on your website. I do not feel alone anymore with this problem. 
- JF

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Dear Jeremy, your article “Big Brown Eyes Looking Up at Me” was stupendous. I only wish that you were a therapist in PA for my 17 year old son. Keep on writing. - G.M.

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I wanted to thank you for a fantastic newsletter. I am inspired by your writings and it helps me to find my own words with the experiences I have with my 2 year old boy. My wife is expecting our second child (a girl!) and we are so excited and challenged by the thought. - Stanis Antonites

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I loved Big Brown Eyes. I used to sit and watch my dad’s morning ablutions every chance I could when I was small. - Amy

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 Thank you for sharing such a well written, emotional and powerful piece, Benefit of Losing Sleep. You have the talent and the finesse to communicate your experiences. Please reserve me at least 100 books when is published. – GW

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I also wanted to tell you that I think Benefit of Losing Sleep is the best piece you have written yet. Each article gets better and better. - Doug

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What a touching story [No Patch]. I completely understand the dilemma you had to face, one I’ve had to deal with many, many times myself. It’s interesting and refreshing to see it from a father’s perspective. One doesn’t get to see that side very often. - Mary Ann

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I just read your article, “Anxiety of Leaving in the Morning,” that is posted on the Fatherville.com Home Page.  I enjoyed it as parts of it are all to familiar.  I have a 5 year old, a 3 year old, and a 1 year old that will be 2 next month.  The youngest, a daughter, thinks there is nothing better than sitting in the couch and sharing daddy’s cereal.  The part that really hit home though was the ending about leaving for work.  I have had to, more than once, wipe away the tears of guilt and anxiety as I drove to work. I am an “older” dad and look forward to reading “Dear Old – At Least Older – Dads” (note: where Jeremy was quoted in the Washington Post). I just subscribed to your mailing list and plan on reading more of your work. - Dan

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